I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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