a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize