Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Nicole vs. Life
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
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