So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Randomize
