so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
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