worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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