yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
