Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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