I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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