Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize