maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I'm at about main and main street
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
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