whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Randomize