Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
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I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
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So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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