I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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