I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
