Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize