He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
