it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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