I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
