Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
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its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
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Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
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