Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
