went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
It's never too late to be topless.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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