Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
