I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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