Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
