Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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