is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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