he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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