In the future we'll all be gay
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
organizing the empties. That sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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