If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
