I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
