Your face is a jimmy john
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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