Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
