Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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