he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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