I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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