We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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