he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
