so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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