We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
