People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
Michael Bay diarrhea
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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