That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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