good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
You need Xanax blowdarts
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
