my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize