I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize