The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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