The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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