there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
