You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
