i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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