i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
